In the beginning, this blog was formless and void. The mass of my thoughts were the size of a Planck length, 10-35 meters. Then due to a random vacuum fluctuation they began to expand at an exponential rate. Within 1/1032 of a second, they had doubled 100 times. This process of expansion had continued unimpeded until reaching the age of 40. At that point the rate of expanding thought is met by the opposing force of frontal lobe shrinkage. From that point on, the universe of thought has begun the slow but steadily increased acceleration of shrinkage, ultimately leading to total and complete implosion known as the Big Crunch. The precise time of this final implosion is difficult to determine exactly. This blog will chronicle the phenomenological characteristics of this implosion. While nothing can be learned from analyzing this process to benefit anyone, it is entertaining to watch.
So gawk on!
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I'm slightly different, but not in a biologically significant way...
I'm slightly different, but not in a biologically significant way...
6 comments:
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.I can hardly believe my eyes! The great SFL has finally branched out from comments alone to his own exploration in to the minds eye. I am so excited!
Now didn't I always tell you you should have your own blog??? Well, perhaps I mentioned it to Clair and she relayed it to you...I don't think I actually told you myself. But come now, admit, you're having fun. Now we all get to harass YOU instead of the other way around!!!! *imitates Clair's best evil chuckle* Muahahahah! This promises great entertainment.
(And no, I haven't forgotten I have a blog too. Life gets in the way. But I have a huge post just waiting to be finished that should be done in the next day or so...ask Clair for confirmation if you do not believe me. Of course, now that you have your OWN blog to keep you busy, perhaps your frunken lobe doesn't need quite as much stimulation from other sources...?)
I can't say welcome to the blogging world because you've been a part of it for, what, a year and a half or more? But now we shall all be treated to the wonderfully original philosophic and scientific ramblings of the ever-amused, ever-amusing Shrunken Frontal Lobe -- and not just in the comments section of someone else's blog!!! "Yippie!" (as Clair likes to say...)
May this be the first of many postings to come!
Did someone say something? *looking around with a dazed and confused look*
*Seeing no one, the saddened frunken lobed geezer resumes his previous activities*
Oh well, perhaps it was someone, maybe even my parallel self from the parallel universe that Quantum Physicists have mathematically determined is theoretically possible. Yes, frunkeness is pervasive, present not only here in this Universe, but in other universes as well. So, as I sit here and write, a parallel dufus, perhaps named "Anti-Thal", is likewise sitting (or maybe floating) and writing about me in his parallel universe. Maybe even his mental vibe is influencing my pathetic writings.
Well, I don't know if AT (as I like to think of him) has to go to bathroom as bad as I do, but I'm leaving.... for now.
bye! bye!
*takes deep breath to begin cyber-shouting*
YES, SFL, SOMEONE SAID SOMETHING!!! SEVERAL SOMEONES, IN FACT! PERHAPS THE POOR WIDDLE FRUNKEN SHRONTAL LOBE ISN'T THE ONLY THING HAVING DIFFICULTIES?
*gasps in a breath of air*
I WILL HAVE TO REMEMBER TO TYPE EVERY POST FROM NOW ON IN CAPS SO THAT THE GREAT SFL CAN HEAR EVERYTHING I SAY!
...or maybe the great sfl doesn't want to hear everything i say...perhaps this lack of hearing is selective, as in so many other males of the species?
Let's see if he hears this:
Oh, SFL! I just made a fresh, warm batch of chocolate chip cookies!!
*sits back to see if experiment was successful*
*snif* *opens eyes* *snif* *looks around* *pulls head off pillow* *snif, snif*
Do I smell something? I know I did not have gas, so it must be something else...not to mention it doesn't smell like gas
Hummmmmmmm.........*now the basal mental functions are beginning to work, those functions just above the ones keeping sfl's heart beating and lungs working*
The great lumbering oaf rises from his couch lair *scratch, scratch* to begin the search for the source of that smell and ultimately to consummate that most primitive of acts, foraging.
Well, the experiment KIND OF worked...at least now we all know sfl's nose is functioning properly. Yippie for the nose!
As my father often likes to intone, "The nose knows!" That one ranks right up there with his other favourites, "How now, brown cow?" and "Iiiinn your Eeeeaaster bon-NIT!" and "Fetch my dungarees, will ya?" and all those other wonderful phrases of an almost bygone era...
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